One time my friend Sneery went to Beijing, China on his way back from Santarchy Tokyo. He met up with our friend Sascha who took him out to dinner with some business associates at a very authentic Chinese restaurant where they proceeded to order off-menu. A variety of dishes arrived ( Read more... )

Let's say that you're having a technical problem. Your CSS code isn't rendering correctly, or your TV isn't hooked up right, or your car isn't running properly or something ( Read more... )

A while ago I told the story about the guy who did not get any ice cream. On my last day in Japan I was poking around Tokyo Hands and I in the "signs and placards" department, next to the "large office supplies" department, they had this tiny sign. I don't read Kanji but I'm pretty sure this is the international sign for not getting any ice cream ( Read more... )

gpvillamil has just pointed out that earning a new puppy is the exact opposite of not getting any ice cream.

At our office we've been using "that's what you get" in situations where people start complaining about unforeseen outcomes. Results that anyone should have seen coming. For example John McCain nominates "a fellow maverick" and then his aides freak out when Sarah Palin goes rogue? That's what you get.

mbod's mom is attributed with originating this ( Read more... )

My co-worker Adam was visiting a grocery store once. At the door was a woman who was being questioned by the security guard.

"Please open your purse, ma'am."
"No way!"
"Several people reported that they saw you shoplifting."
"It's private! I don't gotta show you nothing!"
"If you don't, I'll call the police and they will search your bag."Just ( Read more... )

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Whenever matrushkaka or I screw up I'll shake my fist dramatically and shout "Let this be a lesson to you!" I'm not attempting to call anyone an idiot when I say this - it's just that failure is eduational. There are valuable lessons in failure, even epic failure, and if you learn from your failures you won't do them again. Conversely, if you don't learn ( Read more... )

matrushkaka speaks very well, but every once in a while she comes across a word that she's only read and isn't sure how to say. This also happens to hearing people - I had a friend who called Yosemite park "Yaw-see-maw-tee" and called pedestrian crossings "Ped Zings" - but it happens more with matrushkaka because even when someone speaks she just sees the lip movemment ( Read more... )

One time matrushkaka and I found a video on the internet depicting a Japanese woman and a physically restrained man engaging in a consensual act. The link to this video contained a lot of comments such as "grossest video ever", "ach. my brain.", or "i have no soul anymore." Someone eventually posted a summary of the video for those who didn't want to see it ( Read more... )